You Can Feel it in the Air

Yes, ladies and gentlemen: I'm coming back.

After a prolonged hiatus, I am returning to the airwaves on Friday, February 8 at 7:00 PM Central to bring you an all new edition of The Dark Side.

On February 8, I'll be talking with Kashif Ali, an Ameircan who happens, also, to be a Muslim.

We'll be discussing the relities of Islam vs the perception of some within the US, as well as what it's like to be be a Muslim in the US these days.

Tune in.

At the Eve of 2008

2007 (or, as I like to call it "The Year of the Mongoose with Tourrette's Syndrome") is coming to an end. It only seems fitting to have a kind of retrospective, looking back at all the nonsense and various liver-quaking events of the last 365 1/4 days.

This year, of course, marked the birth of The Dark Side, as well as the formation of The Free World Radio Network. For me, this is obviously a milestone, as it marked my return to the air, as well as illustrating the point that I am not alone out there. For those of you reading this, it marks an obvious milestone, as it means, well...you're reading this.

2007 also heralded Rob Zombie's attempt at directing a remake of Halloween...we all know what I thought of that.

This year, we also had to bid an indifferent "so it goes" to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.,a man who inspired me to become unstuck in time and explore the truth about mirrors.

That irritating, blonde borderline celebrity with the huge fake knockers snuffed it.

And finally, 2007 marked yet another year during which I was not invited to participate in a wild, semi-legal three-way sex-jam with Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt.


*sigh* Maybe next year.

Sweet, Hairy Nipples of Christ! I Have a Blog!

Look, I know I've said I'd be keeping this up to date more, then, immediately thereafter, I disappeared for nearly two bloody months.

I've some good excuses.

I've had a lot of people coming and going through my home, plus, I can't account for much of my whereabouts from November 12 - this morning, owing to vast quantities of an unidentifiable (yet thoroughly amusing) blue-green powder I've been consuming lately.

I'm back here, though. Yes, it may be sporadic for a while, owing to the numerous people still using my home as a bit of a way-station, but I'm here none the less.

While there have been huge and profound occurrences in the world of politics since my last entry, I'm going to deliberately ignore those for now.

Instead, I'm just going to randomly rant until something at least mildly humorous to me comes out on the page. This could take a while.

Recently, I've come to the conclusion that more people need to be pointed to and laughed at. I know, that sounds a bit calloused, but hear me out...

We live in a society where we celebrate those who are famous for no reason whatsoever (Brittney Speares, Paris Hilton, George Bush, etc) and every one of them wind up doing something (or many things) that are pathetic by the standards of sentient beings, yet, there are those amoung us who think these..."people" are being treated unfairly.

From the right-wing radio monkeys who think George Bush is being attacked because he's not a Democrat, and he will go down in history as being "a great president" rather than "a scientific experiment gone horribly wrong" to the odd, weeping genetic construct on You Tube entreating us to "leave Brittney alone! She's a human being!", I see our society crawling with (and, sometimes seemingly dominated by) individuals who can't seem to grasp the reality that there are some animated, pseudo-sentient sacks of meat that are, in essence (or, in at least one case, in a legal sense) dominating our country.

The question used to be "how dumb do you have to be in order to think a video you take of yourself giving head to your boyfriend won't be made public when you are the heir to a vast fortune and a very public figure?"

It has now become "Why do you think, after this video has become publicly available, that George Bush will be remembered as anything OTHER than a rich, idiotic slut?"

Getting Myself Into Trouble Again

Alright, I know, I've been gone for a LONG bloody time, but I'm back with something that is truly worth the wait.

Friends, are you tired of what the president is doing?

Are you sick of sitting, silently while the pretzel-choker gets further and further from rational thought?

Well, it's time to take action and remind this individual that he works for you, not the other way around, and I'm here to tell you exactly how to do it:

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you THE WHITE HOUSE COMMENT LINE!!!!

Call the number listed below and tell them what you think. Remember, the president isn't going to answer and the person who does just works there, so be polite, but don't mince words.

(202) 456-1111

Call polite, but call as much as you feel you need to in order to be heard. The number, again:

(202) 456-1111

I Really Need to Pay More Attention When I Order Things Online

I'm trying to learn Japanese. I've always found the language fascinating, even though I can't understand a bloody word of it.

So, I ordered one of those Learn Japanese While You're totally Shit-faced computer programs.

Well, it arrived in the mail today and I put it in.

Unfortunately, the entire thing has two very troublesome problems for me:

1. All the instructions are in Kanji. I don't understand spoken Japanese, how in the seven hells am I going to be able to understand written Japanese?

2. As it turns out, it doesn't really matter, since it is meant to teach you Japanese, but only if your primary language is bloody German.

I'm Back, and I'm On A Mission!

I've been gone for a while. The Prime Material Universe kept me pretty busy for a few weeks, which kept me from being on air or updating this blog. That is no longer the case.

At least to an extent.

Tomorrow night, I will be returning to the air waves to host The Dark Side. I've been itching to do it. I'm happy I'll be back.

Sadly, due to various external forces, it will, quite possibly, be my last broadcast for 2007. I tend to have many house guests this time of year, and it's difficult to broadcast a radio show when Aunt Alicia, who is half-deaf, is trying to watch The Ghost Whisperer in the room that doubles as my broadcast studio.

This does not mean, however, that I am going to be disappearing again. On the contrary, I will be making my presence known quite vehemently here, on The Drudge Retort, and with the odd opinion piece submitted to Op Ed News. Trust me, you'll still be hearing a lot from the old Reverend, just not necessarily in the literal "hearing" sense.

As for tomorrow night:

Well, the title of this post does say I'm on a mission. That mission becomes public tomorrow night at 7:00 PM Central. Be warned, o' lovely listeners: I may well run long tomorrow, so you may need to catch part (or maybe even half) the show via the archive.

Talk to you then.

It's Been a Few Days, I know

I've been a bit busy, seeing as there is a life out in the Prime Material that I have to take care of, plus I've been writing some mad opinion pieces for Op Ed News. I slacked off. I know.

But you know I love you, right?

Those other sites, they didn't mean anything. They were just there and I was lonely.

You know you're the site of my dreams, right, baby?